Govardhana I’m still struggling to

November 1st, 2001


I’m still struggling to write the journal. I was wondering if I should even continue?at least for this month. I can’t fathom the difficulty. I’ve been focused on my vow with determination. I rose early, engaged in chanting and hearing about Krishna for pretty much the whole day. I also walked around Govardhana Hill but, still, little came. Nothing to write about.

Most of the receivers of the journal are working quite hard to meet their responsibilities. At times their worldly duties seem to overwhelm even spiritual life. For many, their solace, their hope, is to one day again return to visit Vrindaban or Mayapur?places where Krishna consciousness was so real for them.

Even when my father visited Sri Vrindaban in 1982 he noticed the predominance of Krishna in Vrindaban as compared to the West. He told me, while pinching his thumb and index finger together to indicate something very small, “In the West Hare Krishna is this big.” Then, stretching his arms open wide, a classic pose to indicate something gigantic, he commented in contrast, “But here [in Vrindaban], it is this big!”

I will try to continue the journal this month to spark memories and remembrances of Krishna consciousness, which are vivid in the dhama?images that seem to inspire devotees in spiritual life, whether they have visited here or not.

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