Kartik Journal

November 11th, 2007

November 6, 2007
Sri Govardhana

A lesson and a thought:

This morning I took a devotee on parikrama who has never been to the dhama. We stop at a quaint favorite temple of mine. I give a substantial donation, at least for such a small temple, and place it on the altar in front of the pujari. Following my lead, my parikrama companion pulls out his wallet to follow suit reaching for some big bills. I stop him:

“No need,” I explain discreetly, “I gave more than enough.”

The pujari, however, notices:

“Please do not mind. I do not care for the money, but it is an offense to interfere with charity to the Deity. Remember the story of Bali Maharaja. His guru, Sukracarya advised him to not accede to Vamana’s request for charity, but his counsel was condemned as offense to Visnu.”

I turn to my companion, “He’s right. Leave a donation.”

Japa thought:

Offenses can often be subtle. It’s only possible to avoid them all when our consciousness is imbued with devotion and thus by nature respectful to everyone and everything. That’s exclusively achievable by the mercy of the holy name. I chant for sensitivity towards the devotees, the deities, the holy name and all living entities, to avoid offense at all cost.

November 7, 2007
Sri Govardhana

Japa thought:

Chanting begins with humility. I search my heart, but don’t feel humble. What to do? Can I simply think humble? It’s not a mental conception, however. Then how to begin my bhajan? Pray hard enough and you are humble. Prayer is humility.

November 8, 2007
Sri Govardhana

Japa thought:

Spiritual life: Feeling good about feeling bad about one self.

November 9, 2007
Sri Govardhana

Japa thought:

The obstacles to pure chanting seem insurmountable. I admit my helplessness. The only hope for success; complete dependence on Krishna.

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